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Quest
Trust Not The System.

Also known as "Questtrek".

I make art and occasionally games.

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I always try to give the best feedback possible.

I am open to playtesting if you want another opinion.

Death to AI!

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Joined on 4/8/21

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Writer's Jam 2

Posted by Quest - December 24th, 2023


Here is my submission for the Writer's Jam 2 by @jamriot.


The story is called "All Must Sleep". It includes the prompts "Sleep" and "Wicked" (and partially "Cabin")


Keep in mind that this is a murder mystery/thriller, and as such should only be viewed by mature audiences only.


Here is the link to google doc:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1mYUEiDOuLKPusPt_aJbKQkshCbvHHCvV0S6mALI8GZg/edit?usp=sharing


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Comments

Nicely done! Thanks for participating in the Writer's Jam! You did a great job containing this piece and making this town feel like it was the whole world to the characters through your different word choices. There's a few insignificant typos, but nothing that disrupts the story significantly.

There's parts of this story that feel a bit disjointed or like they would be better off with more context, but I understand that the limitations of this Jam, word count and time-wise, are demanding enough as is, but I would love to see more context behind the other murders or behind the different character's reactions leading up to this moment if you ever wanted to expand on what you made here! Thanks again for participating!

Thank you for the feedback! And yeah, time was a limitation being so close to the holidays and all. Everything after the first two parts were extremely rushed. Is there a possibility of continuing this in another jam (assuming it fits the prompts), or would I have to start from scratch with a new idea? Even if I can't continue it in a jam, I will continue writing this story. Thanks again!

123 fan